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How to React When Facebook Memories Surface


Everyone has a collection of memories that hold a special place within our hearts and minds. Such memories are events which we dearly wish we could relive not only for the experience it brought but for the people who were there with us. For those who have recently lost a loved one or are still finding coping with their loss to be difficult, these can trigger a stew of emotions. For some, these can trigger happy, nostalgic feelings, while for others, serve as a reminder of loss and heartache.


As the activity of individuals increases on Facebook, reminders are inevitable; perhaps Facebook has reminded you of the anniversary of becoming “friends”, attending a game or concert, a holiday or birthday. While never done with the intention of causing emotional distress, Facebook aims to spark cheery and bright moments in one’s day by reminding them of noteworthy times in their lives. Maybe Facebook had reminded you of the anniversary of your loved one’s death and has brought up intense feelings of grief. These memories can serve as a milestone signifying how far you’ve come in your grief journey, as well as vehicles to celebrate your loved one and the marvelous life they lived.


Below are three easy ways in which you can see Facebook’s annual reminders from a different perspective, as for how they are meant to be recognized – as joyous celebrations:


  • Reminisce on the Excitement – Suppose the anniversary of an event you and the loved one enjoyed together is in your feed. Perhaps this was a concert or ball game. Remember the thrill, atmosphere and emotions you felt and relish in those; focus on the happy times shared together rather than on the void may be feeling, which may help you to heal and move forward on your grief journey. Consider attending the same event with a friend, sibling or child and make it a tradition.
  • Landmark the Date(s) – Yet another way Facebook attempts to organize our lives is through reminding users of each friend’s birthday. Say you are reminded by Facebook of the date and want to celebrate as if they were still here – what a great idea! It is still a milestone worthy of celebrating, and the date can serve additionally as a special time to reunite with family and loved ones you may not have seen all year or more.
  • Share the Memory – When a memory involving a lost loved one finds itself in your feed, share it with those who would appreciate the knowledge; spread the love! You can even transform your loved one’s Facebook profile into a memorial page. Doing so allows family and friends to have an online, easily accessible place to share and honor your loved one.